Ettie Newlands

While our definition of “old” changes as we do, most of us realize the same things in that process. Again, I have MaryLou to thank for these things those of us of a certain age can agree with:

• I talk to myself, because there are times I need expert advice.

• I consider "in style" to be the clothes that still fit.

• I don't need anger management, I need people to stop aggravating me. My people skills are just fine, it’s my tolerance of annoying folks that needs work.

• The biggest lie I tell myself is, "I don't need to write that down. I'll remember it."

• I have days when my life is just a tent away from a circus.

• These days, "on time" is when I get there.

• Even duct tape can't fix stupid - but it sure does muffle the sound.

• Wouldn't it be wonderful if we could put ourselves in the dryer for 10 minutes, then come out wrinkle-free and three sizes smaller?

• Lately, I've noticed people my age are so much older than I am.

• "Getting lucky" means walking into a room and remembering why I'm there.

• When I was a child, I thought nap time was a punishment. Now it feels like a mini vacation.

• Speaking of which, some days, I have no idea what I’m doing out of bed.

• I thought growing old would take longer.

The strangest thing about aging is that I didn’t see it coming.


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